High achievers love setting goals. I get it. There’s nothing more satisfying than setting a big scary goal, working hard toward it for a long time, and then basking in the glory of your accomplishment when you finally achieve it. While accomplishing goals feels rewarding, if you don’t take time to think about why you are striving for those particular goals, overtime you may start to feel like something is missing. That’s where values come in.
The difference between goals and values
Goals: Goals are finite. You accomplish the goal, you check it off your list, you celebrate, then you make a new goal. Here are some examples of goals: Earning your Ph.D, getting promoted, finishing a marathon, knitting a scarf.
Values: Values are the “why” behind your goals. They’re your larger reason for doing what you do. Values guide who you want to be and what you want your life to be about. They’re ongoing. You’ll never achieve them or check them off your list. Here are some examples of values: adventure, family, simplicity, courage, efficiency, novelty, flexibility, and self-respect.
Your values should guide the goals you choose and how you pursue them
If you want to feel truly fulfilled, you need to make sure your goals align with your larger vision of the person you want to be and what you want your life to be about. Try asking yourself the following questions:
- Why do your goals matter to you?
- What are the top 2-3 values you want to focus on in this season of your life, and how do your goals connect with these?
- How do your goals align with your larger vision of who you want to be and what you want your life to be about?
- What kind of person do you want to be while pursuing your goals?
- How do you want to treat yourself and others throughout the process of working toward your goals?
Interested in exploring your values with the support of a therapist? I specialize in helping high-performing adults work with their anxiety, stress, and perfectionism and lean into meaningful, values driven-lives. Schedule a free consultation to see if we are a good match.
This blog post isn’t intended as professional counseling or clinical advice. If you’re in need of support, please consider speaking to a professional to be evaluated.