No matter how you voted in the recent election, in the coming weeks and months you’ll likely find yourself in conversations with people who voted differently than you. These conversations can erode relationships you care about if you don’t approach them with intention and care. On the flip side, they’re an opportunity for you to practice showing up as the person you want to be even when it’s hard.
Before you head into uncomfortable political conversations this holiday season, take some time to reflect on the questions below to help you prepare:
- What are my thoughts and feelings about the recent election?
- Which policy issues are most important to me and why? What are my political values?
- What happens to me internally when I’m with people who have different beliefs than me? What thoughts and emotions do I experience, and how does my body feel? What do I have an urge to do?
- Is it important to me to maintain relationships with people who have opposing views? If so, which people and why?
- Identify your interpersonal values. How do I want to show up in conversations with people who have different beliefs than me? What kind of person do I want to be? Pick one to three values that represent how you want to conduct yourself during these uncomfortable political conversations. Here are some examples:
- Curious
- Honest
- Open
- Boundaried
- Assertive
- Empathic
- Respectful
- Direct
- Calm
- Now put it all together. How, specifically, can you align with both your political values and your interpersonal values during these tough conversations?
- What, specifically, can I do to help myself stay calm and centered during the conversation? If you need some ideas, check out this list of grounding techniques.
Remember, it is possible to stay true to your political beliefs and to conduct yourself in a manner that aligns with your interpersonal values. You don’t have to choose one or the other.
I am a former US Senate staffer turned therapist. I specialize in helping high-performing adults work with their anxiety and perfectionism and lean into meaningful, values driven-lives. Schedule a free consultation to see if we are a good match.
This blog post isn’t intended as professional counseling or clinical advice. If you’re in need of support, please consider speaking to a professional to be evaluated.