Last week I made the mistake of putting loose leaf tea down the disposal. Not just a little bit. It was a LOT. When I flicked the disposal switch on and cranked the faucet the sink filled up with water. The water swirled around angrily, splashing my husband and me and showering our counter. I overwhelmed the disposal with too much all at once and now it was spinning violently but making no progress in breaking down the leaves.

When you’ve got more on your plate than you can handle it might feel as if you’re whirring around like the jammed disposal. Your racing thoughts swirl like the water in the sink. You start running around frantically from task to task, making little headway. 

So how’d we fix the disposal? We consulted my husband’s friend (a plummer) who told us to press the reset button. We scooped out the tea leaves, hit the reset button, and voilà! Problem solved. Next time you notice you’re feeling overwhelmed, follow these three steps to hit your reset button. 

Step 1: Observe Yourself

Take a few minutes to slow down and notice what’s happening internally. What thoughts and emotions are you having? How does your body feel? What do you have an urge to do or to not do right now? Psychologist Susan David, PhD, recommends viewing your emotions as a source of data. This concept can be extended to thoughts, physical sensations, behavior, and urges as well. It’s all helpful information to gather. Consider briefly listing what you notice on paper. This extra step can help you put additional distance between yourself and your internal experience. Observing your internal experience is a skill commonly practiced in Acceptance and Committment Therapy (ACT). 

Step 2: Create Boundaries

Often we feel overwhelmed because we have not created enough boundaries for ourselves. We work outside normal work hours. We exercise even when our body is telling us we could use a break. We interrupt what we’re doing to check our phone every time we get a notification. Use the data you just collected to evaluate what you need to adjust and what boundaries would be helpful for you. Here are some examples of boundaries you might set:

• I will stop working at 5:00pm.
•  I will take a week off from intense exercise to give my body and mind a break.
•  I will turn my work phone off after hours.
• I will not eat lunch at my computer.

Step 3: Check Your Work

As you experiment with implementing boundaries for yourself, keep periodically observing your internal experience. What do you notice? How have your thoughts, emotions, behaviors, physical sensations, and urges changed? Use this data to help you decide if you want to maintain these boundries or make adjustments. 

Interested in reducing overwhelm with the support of a therapist? I specialize in helping high-performing adults lean into meaningful, values driven-lives. Schedule a free consultation to see if we are a good match.

This blog post isn’t intended as professional counseling or clinical advice. If you’re in need of support, please consider speaking to a professional to be evaluated.